ALMA MATER...1st Note

Everyone owes something to their alma-mater so i thought why not write something about it. I always hear people telling me that their college was amazing and was the best college experience anybody might have had and i remain quiet to them. I know everyone is obliged to feel that the time they spent at college was THE BEST...but aa far as i am concerned i dont have words for the experience i had, because seriously i am short of words for it...as it can never be put on words....it was a place where somehow every guy was above average, not great mind you, so its a place where Anil Kumar Bairwa becomes Barry....where sameep jung pandey becomes sandeep john....nd an unsuspecting foreigner who has stepped foot in India for the first time becomes Bhusand from allistair....people call him anything that comes to mind and i still wonder how he got that name---Kabootar....I know every college is incomplete without the mention of its ragging so i would start with a small mention of ours. I still remember our first 'CALL' in which me mangla nd vibhor went together...A senior nonchalantly gave mangla a pen and asked him to shove it in his ass...."Issko G**nd mein daal dey" and voila.....satyadeep maheshwari(our senior who was bending at that time to pick something from his wardrobe)jumped up at that time and gave a shriek followed by a sound of deathening slap...Suddenly everybody realised what had happened. Mangla had shovelled the pen up his ass and got a slap as return gift...nd he just said...."Boss aapne kahaa Gaa** mein dey dey....kiski yehh tohh bataya nahii..." i dont remember how many slaps i and vibhor had to face on that day because of mangla but still i just remember that shriek and the slap well enough to date which fades everything else. RHTDM came at that very time...i remember going into rooms of MP guys everyday...the room of pathak and ravi singh...where singhvi would be sitting smiling...an old transistor would be blaring...Zara Zara behekta hain mehekta hain aaj tohh mera tan badan......but dont mistake me there was no romance involved there...everybody had their faces red at that moment and they always seemed they had been brutally beaten. one more incident was there which brought out the real mangal out of prashant mangla....incident was there was a custom in UP group....we had to participate in debate....with real intellectual topic. I remember Mangla pittted against baddal goyal...with topic as...."Osama Bin Laden Kahaan hain"...the only difference was they had to abuse each other and slap each other at the same time while debating....i remember baddal goyal asking mangla..."Osama bin laden kahaan hain behen k lau**" and slapped mangla nd mangla was like sehwag in opening...uthappa in last over....hayden with mongoose bat...dhoni on one down...and yusuf pathan against a spinner....he started saying mujhe kyaa pataa maa ke la**e....ndd rest were all 3-dimensional gaalis and slaps all over baddal goyal..only difference was baddal goyal after slapping mangla put his hand down but mangla just continued and he did'nt even put his hands down. Seniors were taken aback by this unexpected onslaught by mangla..they descended over turf and made mangla stop and said now we wud put him with a better opposition...and put pachaouria in front of him...i could see pachaouria trembling and rest is history. The only satisfaction badddal goyal had that he atleast had one opening slap. Whoever got in mangoose way got a real hard day.the only person who put down mangla with efficient ease was dangar(for records and factual detail his name is Avijit Pawar)i remember him getting hold of mangla's face and pressing him against the wall as if he is ironing his clothes. I remember Chaurasia(Hostel warden and very respected teacher...latest rumour had it that mrinal's dad used to send a suitcase full of money to his house to get yaadav(name Mrinal Prasad) passed every year...)so Chaurasia was educating everybody in hostel that they should keep the hostel clean and throw the garbage only in garbage cans specifically put in the cor....by the time he could finish his sentence to say corner...a polythene filled of garbage of our room came flying from our room down the sky and every body who saw it has vivid descriptions of how it landed on chaurasia's head which was actually thrown by mangal to keep the room clean out of the window....and when chaurasia shouted asking him to come down he was lecturing us on how to keep room clean and hrow garbage cans in time down on the ground floor......To be continued....